'...into our moonless march, come the wizard, come, the wizard comes...'

[marguerite_krux]

Teh funny:

Dear luxuria_oceanus,
I don't really know how to tell you this, our affair is over. I think I realized it when you smacked my butt at the mental hospital and I saw you drive over my boyfriend. I'm sure you're middle-class enough to understand how boring you are. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the bruises and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Go drown yourself,

borg_princess

O.o

*gigglesnorts* That's all kinds of traumatic. Seriously. Hannah Montana underwear?! >_< *scrubs brain*

How it's done:

Dear Someone you recently talked to)
I don't really know how to tell you this,(1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).

(12),
(Your name)

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When you smacked my butt
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Fish - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Green- My Banana
Yellow - My salt-beef bucket
Blue - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Pathetic - That you need a sex-change
Stupid- That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterfiles
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your suicide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ass
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - try to forget that you broke my heart
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Told in my confession today about the moose poachingWill
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Beer- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral/Vitamin water – you should stop picking your nose
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Wine – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – You should get that embarrassing rash checked

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
Canada - You are rather unfortunate

---
Teh serious:

Um, so I'm making a habit of playing least in sight. *sighs* I'm always making apologies and it must sound a little hollow by now but- I just don't feel all that great and I don't want to inflict my mood on you guys so as usual, I run off and dive headfirst into as many fandoms as possible and just immerse myself as fully in them as I can. I eat, sleep and breathe them so I can crowd out all the other thoughts in my head and it gives me something happy and shiny to distract my mind with til I can pull it together again.

Interesting fact: the pills I'm taking, Roaccutane, have been linked to depression. Not straight-out cause-and-effect but there's mutterings it could be one of the factors involved in depression. The doctor I saw the other day told me that a few girls he'd treated had mentioned feeling 'a bit blue' and he suggested they stop taking the pills, a statement they greeted with great horror. They would only consent to taking a lower dose or to taking the pills less often. Lol. The lesson here? 'tis better to be pretty and unhappy than to feel ugly. *snorts*
---
The disturbing:

I- I don't know how it came to this. *clutches head* I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME.

First I half-think about shipping Uther/Morgana 'coz the damn show seems to be getting more and more Arthur/Gwen oriented- *scowls* how very traditional and unoriginal of it *sneers*- and in self-defense, I'm trying to get over Arthur/Morgana so it doesn't hurt as much later.

And now? Well, it started off so innocently- looking up a bunch of Harry/Hermione fics rec'd by the lovely sunny_serenity, and somewhere along the way, I came across an AU fic involving a crossover between HP and the Garth Nix Abhorsen books. I was intrigued by the idea of that crossover- although it turned out to be a snurching of the concepts from those books, specifically, the necromantic bells used to control the Dead, rather than the characters.

The Apprentice and the Necromancer [or here at ff.net] is nothing short of brilliant. It is utterly amazing and wonderful and one of the best fics I've had the fortune of reading. It is what led me to obsess over Hermione/Snape for the past week or so. *headdeskwallfloor* I'm not kidding when I say OBSESS, like, staying up to 2 or 3 in the morning to read fics, yo. I've already had dreams about them, which is bizarre considering how long it usually takes me to dream about a new fandom. Months, if ever.

I feel so incredibly guilty, there seems to be a lot of hate for this ship, but in my defense, I'm not saying pedophilia's okay, or that crossing the teacher/student boundary  is acceptable when it's true love or that rot, because it's NOT, and I can't stand the fics where the authors seem to be justifying abusing the position of authority because, ew, gross, much? *shudders*

I just enjoy the AU!ness of a world where adult!Hermone and Snape could get together and there are a few uber talented authors who make it seem so plausible and make it absolutely beautiful and enthralling.
---
The random:

While I was looking up HG/SS fics on ff.net, it jogged my memory of a time years ago when I went searching for another pairing and I've finally worked out one of the reasons why I hate the Harry Potter movies so much. [Apart from Daniel Radciffe's abysmal acting skills. Or "skills", rather]

It's the casting for Professor McGonagall. As I read the books, I knew that she was supposed to be mature in years but I pictured her as the Polgara kind of ageless, y'know? I totally shipped her with Snape. She was firm and practical and bossy, he was snide and snippy and haughty, they bickered all the time...perfect recipe for romance. All the couples in my ships want to kill each other most of the time, so it makes sense to me, lol. Then out rolls the movie and Maggie Smith, MAGGIE SMITH takes the role...*facepalm* She is a great actress, critically acclaimed and widely celebrated and I'm not disputing her talent, but it totally ruined everything. *sighs* I hold onto grudges like a pro, so I've never quite forgiven the movie adaptation for doing this to me.

Btw. Bat For Lashes? Is AWESOME. I've been listening to The Wizard [watch Natasha Khan perform it here] and it's officially my favorite song for my new ship. [I feel way guilty now- I already have a song for Hermione/Snape and not for some of my longer-term ships? Agh!]
---
Vidspam:
Not really a ship vid, per se, just a few subtle hints here and there. It's really lovely and Snape gets to look like a hero, so yay! I've adored him since book one and it makes it hard for me to watch people be cruel and malign him.